Kindness and compassion are so needed in this world right now. There is so much uncertainty, anger and fear flying through the air that most people put the kindness and compassion on the backburner, without even realizing it. Can we pick up this conversation right now? I think it's time.
4 years ago, I tragically lost my son Mateo. I remember after it happened, walking through the street, driving in my car and going to the grocery store and feeling like my world was crumbling around me, while everyone was just going about their day. I remember other moms not being able to look me in the eye and a colleague upset with me about something that had nothing to do with me and I felt broken, defeated, depressed and absolutely questioning what the hell I was doing here on planet earth. Why? Didn't these women know what I had just endured? They were mothers, why couldn't they dig deep and be kind and compassionate to another mom who had just lost her child. I wanted to go far far away. It was clearly the most challenging time for me in my life.
What I needed so badly at that time, was kindness and compassion. I needed it from those around me and I needed it from myself. That was the big struggle, to be kind to myself.
I had to remind myself constantly ( and I still do) that his death was not my fault, that I was a good mother, that I was there for him in life. I adored my son, cherished and valued him, loved him fiercely. I still couldn't save him.
I went to a Healing Hearts meeting the other night. A meeting for family members who have lost someone to fentanyl/addiction. It was heartbreaking.
One of the only reasons I actually stayed at that meeting was because of the kindness and compassion of the leader Jennifer. She, like many of us, had lost her son, 4 years ago and yet has had the courage to set up and organize these monthly meetings for grieving family members. She's even added an extra meeting for the growing community of family members who are losing loved ones to the addiction/opioid crisis. What an amazing, strong, courageous, compassionate and kind woman. I aspire to have her courage.
Imagine how many will be needing kindness and compassion in the midst of losing loved ones to not only COVID-19 but to the opioid crisis, suicide, whatever else we may be losing loved ones to in 2020. Imagine if we all spread kindness and compassion to ourselves, so that we can spread it to others? How much more peace there would be in the world?
Yes, I'm ranting but those of you who have been through a deep, soul-changing, life-altering trauma like I have, understand why.
So I'm putting it out there, how can you practice more kindness and compassion in your own life? To yourself and to others around you? Please leave your comments.
We need your kindness and your compassion right now, more than ever.